I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
