It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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