so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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