Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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