i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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