drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
