Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
