I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
