Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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