In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
third nipple confirmed
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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