apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize
