ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
