All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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