if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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