The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Randomize
