Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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