Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
