So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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