Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
