I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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