Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
