Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
