We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
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the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
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nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
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