I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize
