I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
