Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

You're a womanizer and a bitch.

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(586): View more from Michigan

the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable

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(936): View more from Texas

You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home

(254): View more from Texas

Challenge accepted.

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(816): View more from Missouri

I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(401): View more from Rhode Island

My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.

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(361): View more from Texas

I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.

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(626): View more from California

If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.

(1-626): View more from California

all $38?

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