K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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