And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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