love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
