i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
