Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Randomize
