don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
