Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Shame - the story of my life.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
