I think I died a long time ago.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
you had me at cake vodka
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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