Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize