This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize