Buhtt sex?
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
