How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
My breasts were aching with rage.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
