you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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