you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I think we might need a safe word for this...
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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