I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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