he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
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