going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
they're like a gay fantastic four
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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