He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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