Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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