I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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