Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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