in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize