So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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