i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
