Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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