yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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