Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
